the ordinary hero’s journey of parenting

Good Morning Everyone,

Children Are Wise Giant Spirit in Small Bodies

What would it look like to be on your own Hero’s Journey and also be a good parent? It is the quintessential job of leadership by example. Children know when your actions aren’t matching your words or your vibration (thoughts, beliefs and intentions). They have really accurate Internal Guidance System; and this is what messes them up – your vibration gap.

You’ve all heard the phrase, “Don’t Do as I Do; Do As I Say?” or How about this one, “Because I’m your Mother/Father, and I say so.” Well, that’s the old parenting paradigm. These are the old dictatorial and unconscious parenting style. In other words, the parent doesn’t have to be held accountable for being in alignment and congruent with him/herself…but the kid is held to a higher standard for the parent.

Recently I did a radio interview on Unity.fm.  It is a “conscious parenting” show where they endeavor to raise the children with awareness and intentionality. You can listen here

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In this time of awakening, this is the perfect moment or situation where the parent gets to ask himself, “what would I need to shift or change in order to become congruent with mySelf?” For example if the parent is telling the child to turn off the television and go do his homework, and the child says, “Why do you get to watch television?” This is the moment where the conscious parent would stop and reflect, “Just why am I watching television or surfing the net or watching videos online?”

In the Hero’s Journey we are always confronted with the opportunity to do things differently by growing ourselves into the person we want our children to become. In this instance the assumption is that the parent wants the child to be well educated, self determining and self motivating in good, productive ways. Is it too late for the parent to shift? Of course not. This is the Hero’s Journey where the parent then reflects on the deeper issues involved in the child’s question as it pertains to her. Our Ordinary Hero stops and reflects: Why am I doing this? What (if anything) am I avoiding? What would I rather be doing that would serve me? Gee, I haven’t read a book in years. I would love to get back to my watercolors. I haven’t written in my journal for quite awhile.

The Hero Parent uses the information for their own personal growth and personal development, thus modeling to the child the ability and willingness to continue to expand and evolve personally. This is an example of conscious parenting; seeing the child as unique, valid being capable of reflecting back to you wise information if you have the eyes to see and the ears to hear. Knowing that just because you’re “grown up” and they are not, doesn’t mean you have all the answers and that they could very possibly have a clearer insight than you do.

When my elder son was a little guy, generally he was a very happy contented child. Very quickly I realized that the only time he ever cried was when I was out of alignment: I had shouted at him or misjudged a situation or was being unjust. In those very humbling moments I had the opportunity to “wake up”, get back into alignment with mySelf and do it over. I could breathe, apologize and open my heart back to Love. I could then reflect on why I got so upset. What did I think that meant? What could I let go of that closed my heart with fear?

The Ordinary Heroes’ Journey is everyday and every moment with whomever is in front of you at the moment – including your children.

Thanks for reading!

Kath

PS I will be doing a return interview on Unity Family Matters on May 12, 2011.